I may take an insane of crap from the people here and I may miss out on countless opportunities to see famous people play, but I'm glad I'm not at the school of arts.

The performances.
That's why I'm still here.
The ability to share my music with the people unfamiliar with it, rather than those who expect it and expect perfection.
That makes it fun.
"publicity stunts" for the school; that's what half of these things are.
heck, half the school doesn't know theres an orchestra.

All the prep is insanely stressful (I'm practicing 2 hours a day at this point).
but when we get to the actual performance.
most of them are amazing.

From November 21-December 20, I have 11 performances.
All Region, Christmas Caroling at the mall (red cross fundraiser), solo recital, 3 things for the church, my church Christmas musical, school orchestra concert/fiasco
for the chorus director: his chorus concert and his church Christmas cantada.
oh, and a wedding. that I'm playing cello in.... I guess I'm officially a cellist.

some are gonna rock.
others are gonna be fun.
some will leave me in pain, but be well worth it.

I'm already planning for my largest performance.
Beta Convention--in february.
having the willing attention of a few thousand people.
with 100 of them screaming for you by name.
it's amazing. that type of performance. it's what i live for.

That's what I want to do with my life.
If only it wasn't so hard to get off the ground and running.

I may still be finding my sound, but I love my music.
It's an expression of who I am.
something I've known since I was 5. for as long as I can remember.
I just hope everyone who hears it can feel my love for it.